Relationship, Love & Dating Forum
Here you can get advises from experts and other members, meet new friends, share your thoughts and learn how to be successful in love and dating. Join our community, a free global peer-to-peer support forums targeted for interpersonal relationships focused on online dating.

Home » Love Forum » Ask the Dating Expert » I told her I just want to be friends but I don't (How to reverse the process?)
I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9742] Fri, 05 August 2016 10:32 Go to next message
salben is currently offline  salben
Messages: 2
Registered: August 2016
Location: AZ
Karma: 0
Newbie
IP: 68.3.233.27
Hey everyone,

So I got myself in a tricky situation. I am new to dating. I told the girl that I just want to be friends. I called her on the phone. She was grateful that I did and accepted my decision. The truth is, I only said it because I thought that it is what she feels. And in order to not get hurt from her saying that SHE just wants to be friends, I did it. BUT when I talked to her on the phone she actually didn't feel the way I thought she felt, she actually wanted a relationship with me. So I want to reverse the process and don't know how to do it!

I really like this girl a ton, a little too much to be honest. We dated 3 times already. The 3rd time she came over to my place. We didn't have sex even though she clearly gave me signs to initiate it, but I thought it was too early and would ruin the relationship.

I would appreciate your help Smile



Ben
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9746 is a reply to message #9742] Wed, 10 August 2016 13:47 Go to previous messageGo to next message
smith is currently offline  smith
Messages: 4
Registered: April 2016
Location: us
Karma: 0
Newbie
IP: 183.83.36.192
Great, you are fab... Why do you thin that having sex will ruin your relationship. But it actually increases your bond in your relationship. I think you are in love actually, so decide it by yourself weather you want to be in long term or short term relationship.
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9748 is a reply to message #9746] Wed, 10 August 2016 16:42 Go to previous messageGo to next message
salben is currently offline  salben
Messages: 2
Registered: August 2016
Location: AZ
Karma: 0
Newbie
IP: 68.3.233.27
I don't know some stupid studies showed that having sex later would increase the probability of a long term relationship. Any idea on how to approach the situation thou?

Ben
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9750 is a reply to message #9748] Tue, 16 August 2016 09:15 Go to previous messageGo to next message
stacy is currently offline  stacy
Messages: 5
Registered: July 2016
Karma: 0
Newbie
IP: 121.243.75.226
Just remember whatever you do, do it with mutual consent, sex can be helpful for the relationship if both the partners are willing to do that, otherwise it may also ruin the whole situation. Since you are new in a relationship, its better to take the advice of a dating coach, I advice you to go for elenasmodels.com dating coach advice, she is highly experienced and really good, it would greatly help you to improve your love life. Razz
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9766 is a reply to message #9742] Tue, 13 September 2016 14:36 Go to previous messageGo to next message
GerardGold is currently offline  GerardGold
Messages: 2
Registered: September 2016
Karma: 0
Newbie
IP: 121.243.75.226
Salben, from the point of view of a girl she would be disappointed if she was into you and you pulled back. The faster you admit to her that you actually were feeling strongly about her but simply were too shy to admit it, the better.

Strong relationships don't depend on the date number when you had sex but mostly on how strongly want to be together. Quite often in a research about dating they cannot say what leads to what: What was first, the chicken or the egg. Less than a half of research that is published can ever be replicated, i.e. other people get to the same results by asking the same questions. So, one research, especially in a foreign country (or even in a different city than yours), cannot predict what will happen in your particular case. To be universal, results have to be independent on the country and location, and dating surveys are highly dependent on where and how the results were obtained.

Admitting your vulnerability, the fact that you are really into her, helps to build a more trusting relationship, especially if a girl showed her interested clearly.
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9784 is a reply to message #9742] Fri, 14 October 2016 08:17 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Samarth is currently offline  Samarth
Messages: 6
Registered: October 2016
Location: India
Karma: 0
Newbie
IP: 117.214.180.109
Its easy, just go with her on coffee dates, or walk in a park for a few times, and tell her that you have started feeling for her, she will accept it for sure...
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9915 is a reply to message #9742] Fri, 23 June 2017 14:12 Go to previous messageGo to next message
relationshiptips is currently offline  relationshiptips
Messages: 21
Registered: May 2017
Location: USA
Karma: 0
Established member
IP: 122.173.223.203
@salben
you don't need to do anything if you are confident that she loves you. Just wait for special moment to propose her, which also surprise her and happy too.
Re: I told her I just want to be friends but I don't [message #9986 is a reply to message #9742] Thu, 01 February 2018 09:59 Go to previous message
Andrea is currently offline  Andrea
Messages: 13
Registered: December 2017
Location: NSW
Karma: 0
Established member
IP: 49.145.211.231
Try to make show her that you feel more than just friends. Keep your communication line open, treat her on a date and then, when you feel that it's time to say what you feel then, tell her.

Live Life to the Fullest <3
Previous Topic: chaser and chasee. what does that say about us?
Next Topic: Is it unrealistic to be satisfied with a new partner after 60?
Goto Forum:
  


Current Time: Fri Jul 30 09:18:19 EEST 2021

Total time taken to generate the page: 0.01829 seconds